Chapter Overview
AbramHam dies (finally.. we’ve been following him since chapter 12) and Isaac’s life gets mostly ignored while we focus instead on his kids, Jacob and Esau. Esau shows up one day near death, and Jacob coerces Esau to give up his inheritance to not die of hunger.
Additional Thoughts
It’s weird that we gloss over Isaac’s life entirely. Especially after how much time was spent on daddy AbramHam and emphasizing just how important it was to get Isaac. Maybe it’ll pick up on Isaac soon though.
Chapter 25: Jacob and Esau
AKA: The First Con
AKA: Jacob is a Dick: Part 1
- Then again Abraham took a wife, and her name was Keturah.
- And she bare him Zimran, and Jokshan, and Medan, and Midian, and Ishbak, and Shuah.
- And Jokshan begat Sheba, and Dedan. And the sons of Dedan were Asshurim, and Letushim, and Leummim.
- And the sons of Midian; Ephah, and Epher, and Hanoch, and Abidah, and Eldaah. All these were the children of Keturah.
- And Abraham gave all that he had unto Isaac.
- But unto the sons of the concubines, which Abraham had, Abraham gave gifts, and sent them away from Isaac his son, while he yet lived, eastward, unto the east country.
- And these are the days of the years of Abraham’s life which he lived, an hundred threescore and fifteen years.
- Then Abraham gave up the ghost, and died in a good old age, an old man, and full of years; and was gathered to his people.
- And his sons Isaac and Ishmael buried him in the cave of Machpelah, in the field of Ephron the son of Zohar the Hittite, which is before Mamre;
- The field which Abraham purchased of the sons of Heth: there was Abraham buried, and Sarah his wife.
- And it came to pass after the death of Abraham, that God blessed his son Isaac; and Isaac dwelt by the well Lahairoi.
- Now these are the generations of Ishmael, Abraham’s son, whom Hagar the Egyptian, Sarah’s handmaid, bare unto Abraham:
- And these are the names of the sons of Ishmael, by their names, according to their generations: the firstborn of Ishmael, Nebajoth; and Kedar, and Adbeel, and Mibsam,
- And Mishma, and Dumah, and Massa,
- Hadar, and Tema, Jetur, Naphish, and Kedemah:
- These are the sons of Ishmael, and these are their names, by their towns, and by their castles; twelve princes according to their nations.
- And these are the years of the life of Ishmael, an hundred and thirty and seven years: and he gave up the ghost and died; and was gathered unto his people.
- And they dwelt from Havilah unto Shur, that is before Egypt, as thou goest toward Assyria: and he died in the presence of all his brethren.
- And these are the generations of Isaac, Abraham’s son: Abraham begat Isaac:
- And Isaac was forty years old when he took Rebekah to wife, the daughter of Bethuel the Syrian of Padanaram, the sister to Laban the Syrian.
- And Isaac intreated the Lord for his wife, because she was barren: and the Lord was intreated of him, and Rebekah his wife conceived.
- And the children struggled together within her; and she said, If it be so, why am I thus? And she went to enquire of the Lord.
- And the Lord said unto her, Two nations are in thy womb, and two manner of people shall be separated from thy bowels; and the one people shall be stronger than the other people; and the elder shall serve the younger.
- And when her days to be delivered were fulfilled, behold, there were twins in her womb.
- And the first came out red, all over like an hairy garment; and they called his name Esau.
- And after that came his brother out, and his hand took hold on Esau’s heel; and his name was called Jacob: and Isaac was threescore years old when she bare them.
- And the boys grew: and Esau was a cunning hunter, a man of the field; and Jacob was a plain man, dwelling in tents.
- And Isaac loved Esau, because he did eat of his venison: but Rebekah loved Jacob.
- And Jacob sod pottage: and Esau came from the field, and he was faint:
- And Esau said to Jacob, Feed me, I pray thee, with that same red pottage; for I am faint: therefore was his name called Edom.
- And Jacob said, Sell me this day thy birthright.
- And Esau said, Behold, I am at the point to die: and what profit shall this birthright do to me?
- And Jacob said, Swear to me this day; and he sware unto him: and he sold his birthright unto Jacob.
- Then Jacob gave Esau bread and pottage of lentiles; and he did eat and drink, and rose up, and went his way: thus Esau despised his birthright.
- So far, the bible has been ok with polygamy.
- Worthless genealogies time!
6 kiddos - 2 kiddos and 3 kiddos
- 5 kiddos. This author’s desire for the number 7 to show up because 7 is “important” somehow is showing.
- Wow. These other kids got nothing?
- That’s not what verse 5 says. This is a better deal than Ishmael got though.
Also… AbramHam has concubines now? Apparently that’s also allowed by the bible. - That comes out to 175 for those who have trouble with following the math. No respect for Genesis 6:3 either
- He certainly lived to an old age. So old that god should have struck him down 55 years ago.
- Wasn’t Ishmael off forming a country somewhere? This sounds like the same cave. When did Zohar become a Hittite?
- Yep, it’s the same cave. No explanation for how Zohar is suddenly a Hittite.
- Yes, that one from the annoyingly long chapter 24.
- Stop springing genealogies on me by surprise! It’s not funny! I might be mentally scarred…
- 4 kiddos
- 3 kiddos
- 5 kiddos
- Oh look… this is starting to sound somewhat like the 12 tribes of Israel we’ll be seeing later. Any relation?
- How rude… dying at 137 when he was clearly supposed to die 17 years ago.
- So… he died mid day at lunch time with everyone?
- Yeah, we already know that by now.
- This means AbramHam was 140 at the time. Looks like plot demands we learn more about Bethuel here.
- This uses the same misconceptions about how pregnancy happens I mentioned many chapters back. Additional proof that this isn’t a godly inspired document.
- I like how everyone is able to just go check up on god here. Does he just chill around the house somewhere? A mountaintop?
- Sounds like the bible is once again setting up some people to be the designated slave class. Can I take a moment to mention just how repugnant that is?
- Cool.
- So…. covered in blood? Does Rebekah need to have a blood transfusion? Iron tablets? I’m pretty sure she needs treatment.
- That’s a pretty strong baby grasper. Anyone know babies that can firmly grasp things?
- Sounds like we’re getting a shameless plug for the nomadic life again. Hunting/cities bad, tents/sheep good.
- Keep this claim that Jacob loves Esau in mind for verse 31.
- Sounds like Esau just had a hard day at work. Probably needs a nibble
- He’s hungry, as most people are when they’ve been out hunting for a while. Did his name just change too?
- What a dick. Sounds like he got jerk lessons from AbramHam.
- That’s a fair point, but, follow me here, go ask your mom for some food. She’ll feed you.
- This is incredibly stupid… on both of them.
- I’m pretty sure he didn’t despise it, he ws coerced out of it at what sounds like the point of death.